Light humour

[Dino101]

man takes his wife to a disco. 
There's a guy on the dance floor giving it large 
- break dancing, moon walking, back flips, 
the works. The wife turns to her husband 
and says: 
"See that guy? 25 years ago he proposed to me 
and I turned him down.
" Husband says: 
"Looks like he's still celebrating" 

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Wrestling is not FAKE:










Ol' Fred had been a religious man who was in the hospital, near death. The family called their preacher to stand with them. As the preacher stood next to the bed, Ol' Fred's condition appeared to deteriorate and he motioned frantically for something to write on.
The pastor lovingly handed him a pen and a piece of paper, and Ol' Fred used his last bit of energy to scribble a note, then he died. The preacher thought it best not to look at the note at that time, so he placed it in his jacket pocket.
At the funeral, as he was finishing the message, he realised that he was wearing the same jacket that he was wearing when Ol' Fred died. 

He said, "You know, Ol' Fred handed me a note just before he died. I haven't looked at it, but knowing Fred, I'm sure there's a word of inspiration there for us all.
He opened the note, and read out loud, "Hey, you're standing on my oxygen tube!"

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So there was this female business executive who was late for a meeting. She is going 65 on a street where the speed limit is 40. A cop pulls her over and says, “Ma’am, can I please see your license?”
She says “I’m sorry, officer, but I got it revoked two years ago for drunk driving.”
His brow furrows and he straightens up. “Well, can I please see the registration of your car?”
She says “I stole the car and I killed the driver; he’s in the trunk.” “Ma’am, DON’T MOVE, I’m calling for backup.”
He mutters furiously into his walkie-talkie…
Five minutes later, half the squad pulls up, the Chief of Police walks over to the woman’s window.
“Ma’am, can I see your license?” he asks sternly.
“Of course, officer,” she smiles demurely and pulls out a license from her purse.
He squints warily at it. “This looks legitimate,” he mumbles.
“Can I see the registration to this car?”
She pulls it out of the glove compartment and hands it to him.
“Ma’am, stand back!”
He bangs open the trunk of the car and flinches, but it was completely empty…
The woman brandishes a finger at the first cop and says accusingly, “And I’ll bet that liar told you I was speeding too!!”

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